Sunday, December 03, 2006

Could Titus help the Captain chart out a new course?

41 comments:

Anonymous said...

it would take a dump truck(s) to haul all the junk food out of your kitchen lard butt. Could titus even lift the pallets of oreos you have in your dining room?

Anonymous said...

Step two? I think you need to focus on step one first. Step one is quite simple. Start eating for one Jeff. Quit eating for two, three, and four people like you have been doing your entire life. Do the math.

Anonymous said...

"oh my god, it's King Kong!!!"...."wait a minute, I think that's Jeff in his black workout suit!"

Anonymous said...

Hey Jeff, its kinda windy in Phoenix this morning, did you fart or something?

Anonymous said...

When Jeff farts it causes a hurricane, not a small wind.

HA HA HA!!!!

Ted

Anonymous said...

they say you have more chin than chinatown? That true? Chinatown have 1421 Chin. How many chin you have?

"Charlie" Chin
San Francisco

Anonymous said...

oh no me sorry. Chinatown have 1420 Chin. One Chin choke on noodle and die. You have 1420 chin? Maybe more chin?

Charlie

Anonymous said...

Charlie. Jeff has way more chins than chinatown. It would take you three days on your abacus to count his chins.

Blake

Anonymous said...

Vince Neil lost 700% more in two weeks that you have in two and half months. LOSER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You will not be singing GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS anytime soon. You probably just want to SHOUT AT THE DEVIL. What's your favorite Crue album?
Generation Swine released in 1997.
Go roll in the mud you hog.

Matty Ragerts

Anonymous said...

Your team will go scoreless all season pigface!!

Anonymous

Anonymous said...

The only new course you'll see is the ten course meal you eat every night.
Larry K., Somewhere in Washington

Anonymous said...

Oink, Oink!!! I smell bacon.
Hey Nikki, I want to slap that pork ass of yours while you scream like baby pig.
If you're a real "looker" get with "THE HOOKER"

Enough said!!!

Anonymous said...

Hello Jeff,
My name Duane Eggert. I live in Minnesota. I too, am on a weight-loss journey. I have almost reached my goal. I was a whopping 324 pounds and over the last 6 1/2 months have managed to almost reach my final destination of 205 pounds. I am still 4 pounds from my destination. I cannot contain the rage inside of me any longer due to the utmost asses on the internet that choose to demean you and your site. It's people like Ted, Hooker, Blake, and Fast Eddie that have turned me into what I am today. Without their help and constant humiliation, I would have never continued trying to lose weight. It also helped that my father used to call me "The Whopper". He's not here with us any longer, and I wish he could see me now. He used to get so angry at me when I was dating a slightly overweight woman, which later became my fiancee. He not only would constantly ridicule me, but her and her son also. He'd say things like where's "Big and Tasty" and her son "Cheeze Whiz". Needless to say we broke up because of my dad. Now I find myself teasing other fat people...people that used to be like me! And **** **** me, that is not only wrong, but it is rude!!! I have come to hate myself now and what I have become. I find myself taking advantage of overweight woman I meet on the internet. You know the ones who can never get a date, are horny, and just want to get some sex. Rest assured I have used protection though. I could never see myself getting caught up in a trap like that. On the brighter side of things though, these girls will do anything for you though. Just imagine if YOU were so fat that no one wanted to be in public with you, let alone, naked with you. It is so damn fun to get **** drunk at a bar and go slam some hog once in awhile. This is the wrong attitude and approach to take though, I know. I find myself wanting to be like Hooker and Ted though...A dude who does and says what he wants and the chicks dig it. Again...the wrong approach to take. I have always enjoyed your site. Interesting audio blogs, too. I have a lot more to write, but I don't want to bore you. Please respond if you can.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Bout time you get some hot **** on this site. Been waiting for a long time. Got any nude pics of the blonde on the right? That ho fine.
Who Titus?
Darnell
Oakland, CA

"The Captain" said...

I will be posting again on Thursday. Remember, be Nice.
The Captain is out of here!!!
f\

Anonymous said...

Posting on Thursday? Are you on one of your 2-3 day eating binges again and can't break away from the dinner table to get on the computer.

Pigface!!!!! Pigface!!!!!

Anonymous

Anonymous said...

Hello Jeff, Those girls in your video are really hot. How do you know them? Was it cool to meet Titus and Neil? Did you see those chicks in the nude while you were at their house? What did you have to do to have them let you film them? Too bad Tommy Lee wasn't there, they could have had a huge orgy and you could have videotaped it and sold it on the net. That would have been cool.

Courtney, Indiana

Anonymous said...

we'll be nice when you quit being a lard butt.

Anonymous said...

Good job on the weight loss. I will post a link to finalfifty.com on my blog.
Patrick H.

Anonymous said...

If you get the surgery, which one of your stomachs will they staple?

Ernie, Billings (Montana)

"The Captain" said...

VH1 shot the scene with Neil and Titus. I thought it might be helpful to view someone making some lifestyle changes.
The Captain

Anonymous said...

Motley Crue licks donkey ####. AC/DC will rock their world any day. My second favorite band is Bon Jovi. Livin' On a Prayer!!!! That's what it's all about man.

Jacob
Santa Barbara, California

12:35 AM

Anonymous said...

Jeff,
If you combined Titus,Jack Lalane,Richard Simmons,the two gay trainers from Biggest Loser, and Dr. Fatkins into one guru there is still no hope for you to lose all your weight. Call Pizza Hut tonight and order 3 e-large,no wait, 3 big family combinations and have live a little and start being more honest with yourself. We are getting grumpy watching you not LOSE WEIGHT!!!!If you don't do this I am going to call the FCC and file a complaint against this website for false advertisement.Where are those final fifty pounds?Finally,
I know Jared Fogel,Jared Fogel is a friend of mine, Jeff you are no Jared Fogel.
Jimmy

Anonymous said...

It's about time someone comes out and says it. THANK YOU JIMMY. Put down that bag of chips and jar of mayonnaise Jeff, and order up those pizzas you slob.

Henry Rastegar
Arizona

Anonymous said...

Run Jeff Run!!!!! It's Farmer John..... He's chasing you!!!!!

Anonymous

"The Captain" said...

I will be back Friday morning. Make sure to check in.The site is going into overdrive. Same Bat Time, same bat channel.
Final Fifty,
The Captain

Anonymous said...

This website is really funny. I love reading jokes about fat people and making fun of them, too. I love it when fat people fall down or get hurt. It makes me laugh. I was just at a Sam's Club in California about a month ago and saw some fatass lady fall out of her motorized cart when it hit the curb. It was hilarious. She was in so much pain. The more she screamed, the harder I laughed. I was laughing so hard I couldn't even breathe. It's also funny to make pig noises when you see fat people walking towards you. They really get mad. Anybody else out there have any funny fat stories?

Alfonso Vasquez
Tempe, Arizona

Anonymous said...

Old Chinese proverb say, The fatta you aw, the less skinny you will be. Tsing Tao

You fortune cookie read: Many calories await for you in the near future. Tsing Tao

I guess it year of PIG!!! Tsing Tao

Anonymous said...

Whacha gonna leave for Santa if he stops by your house? A milkshake and plate of ribs? Or a rootbeer float and hamhock?

JOSHUA,
NEW MEXICO

Anonymous said...

You should get a job as a dumpster in the back of Hometown Buffet. You are a disgrace to the word PIG!!

Socks Tygres
Washington D.C.

Anonymous said...

Actually Jeff should be more accurate in his posts. It should read same Fat time, same Fat channel. Can you imagine Jeff in a batman suit with all of his rolls? Not only on his back, but real rolls he could throw at villains. The Batmobile could run on Whipcream. Those Vegan enviro freaks would like that,less co2 being emmitted.
Jimmy

Anonymous said...

My mom was wanting to order a few Christmas hams for the holidays. Care if I cut a few off of your back?

Caught you lookin' when I was out HOOKIN'.

Don't feel bad GREASE MAN, some people were born to be fat. You on the other hand were born to be fat AND lazy.

Crawl back over to your mudpit and squeal some more.

Done right, everytime...HOOKER style

Anonymous said...

If it ran on whipcream he'd sit at the exhaust pipe and suck fumes all day.

Who would be his partner...The Pillsbury Doughboy?

The WHOLE ENCHILADA

Cali

Anonymous said...

Damn straight Jimmy,

Only one problem. He wouldn't have any rolls to throw at villians because he would have eaten them all

Marty
you figure it out, USA

Anonymous said...

It's a deep pit tonight! I smell hog!

HA HA! This site is phat. I mean FAT!! HA HA!


Dedrick Gettsbay
VA

"The Captain" said...

Going to bed. I will post your comments tommorrow. I am taking kelp supplements along with l-tyrosine. My thryoid will be kicking into overdrive.
Captain Out

Anonymous said...

Kelp supplements? What the ****? I thought whales ate plankton not seaweed.

Laying it down the way it was supposed to be in the first place...THE HOOKER WAY

Anonymous said...

Every time I visit this site, my disc drive opens up and spews out Crisco, so I can never come back!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

jeff you should be ashamed of yourself.this site is a mockery to people who look to sites like this for guidance. you have allowed this to become a disgrace, this is a 100percent ridicilous joke, just like you.

sincerely,
Jo Ann

Anonymous said...

If you post a pic you better put a warning that this material might not be suitable for some viewers. Kids will have nightmares and everbody else will turn anorexic.

Quit being a pig pigface.

Moby Dick said...

Isn't Craig Titus in prison for murdering his girlfriend and personal secretary? Or was that another bodybuilder?